First, let me state, categorically, here and now, that I hate Spring Forward and Fall Back, otherwise known as the change to and from Daylight Savings Time. This particular blog is not directly about the time change, but indirectly it is. So I need to get that statement out in the open from the beginning.
I was laying awake, hoping beyond hope that sleep would come. Last night, Sunday evening, TDADSTC (the day after daylight savings time change) and I couldn’t go to sleep when I needed to, which meant I would not be able to get up when I am supposed to. So there I was, flipping through the 479 channels available and still couldn’t find anything worth watching, or in my case, listening to, since I was continually closing my eyes trying to will sleep to come. That was how I found myself at Comedy Central listening to a hysterical comedienne from England. I know he is from England because he told us this. I have to believe he is hysterical as that is how he is being billed, packaged and sold on Comedy Central.
Ohhhhhhhhhh, Russell Brand is one fine looking man. Dark. Suave. Black Leather. I was so ready to be amused and entertained by this hunk of English manhood. That was all I was going to get from him though, the thought of, no the desire for amusement or entertainment. Anything beyond a thought didn’t happen.
Don’t get me wrong. He did try. I heard him speaking for God knows how long. Me? Well I eventually drifted off to sleep, either from frustration or exhaustion. I was totally frustrated because the audience was laughing and I hadn’t a clue why. Exhausted because I was expending extreme amounts of energy trying to understand what Russell was saying. I needed an English to English interpreter. Before Russell appeared, ready for his performance, I had spent about 10 minutes listening to the previous comedienne spouting foul words. I understood every one of them. Now, here was a comedienne I wanted to hear and laugh with and didn’t have a clue what he was saying or why the audience laughed. I was an attendee left out in the cold trying to listen to someone who was obviously quite funny. I might have laughed. I might have had a good time and forgotten about the damn time change. I didn’t because I couldn’t understand him.
I used to chalk this up to my being from the South and understanding Southern speak but needing time and patience to understand those who spoke other dialects of American English. I’m not accepting the blame anymore. If a good looking English man can’t speak English so others can understand him, well it’s his own damn fault. As for all of those in the audience who understood and laughed with him, well they were all either audience plants from England or were from New York, which is where the show was taped. Either way it’s not my fault. But it did force me into a fitful sleep, and for that Thank You Russell Brand.