Is it better to wander through the day oblivious to your fashion faux pas wondering why everyone seems to be in such a good mood when you’re around, or would you rather know you made a clothing blunder so that you could wander through the day totally embarrassed with no way to fix it? Yeah, me too.
Take today for instance. Tuesday. Not a special day other than the fact that it’s the first day of the work week after a Monday holiday.
It’s also the day that my fashions failed not once but twice, before I could even leave home this morning.
I enjoyed the sun a bit too much yesterday. I am sore in quite a few places. That means some clothing would irritate the now very pink skin. Selection requires care.
I showered and put on my panties, orange in today’s case. Cut high on the sides and about two inches below the waist, if you’re wondering. I don’t care what size I am, the undies are comfortable and I wear them for me, not to impress anyone.
My plan was to wear a cute pair of dark purple capris pants and a white shirt. The bra I need to wear with the shirt is in the laundry. On to plan two.
Plan two was wear cool white linen pants and a gauzy red shirt. Plan two failed due to a button missing on the shirt. The button, if it existed would have prevented cleavage spillage. On to plan three.
Anyone see a problem yet? Well, keep your mouth shut. I didn’t know an issue was being created.
Some days I am slower than other days.
Plan three was to grab some short sleeve shirt out of the closed, throw it on and, add shoes and hope for the best.
Well that was the plan.
I drove to work with thoughts of fashion far from my mind.
First thing when I get to the office I get some form of caffeinated drink. I not only want it out of habit, I need it out of desperation.
I sit at my desk now, after the first restroom break. The break where I noticed I look pretty damn good in my white linen pants and red short- sleeve shirt. Well I do. If you don’t notice the bright orange panties I’m wearing just for me. The bright orange panties that show very nicely under the crisp, cool, white linen pants.
I don’t live in town. I live in the country. Twenty miles from work.
I get to work at ‘oh my God it’s early’ and probably couldn’t find a store open at this time of day that sells underwear for me.
My current dilemma is this: do I continue my day as if nothing is amiss and allow everyone to laugh at the orange panties under the white linen pants? Or do I take the orange panties off and go au’ naturale and let them laugh at that?
Oh well, I’ve always said I am a humorist with a goal of making people laugh. Done. And at least I have panties on, as could be verified by everyone I see today.
From the life and mind of:
Wanda M. Argersinger
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