I Bags

(Warning: This story may have previously been posted on this blog. I’m too tired to remember.)

 

I currently own 9,347 bags of various sizes, colors, fabrics, designs, and uses. On July 6th or sooner, I will have 9,348 bags.

No. I did not need another bag.

No. I did not intend to purchase bag number 9,348.

No. I do not remember buying this bag.

No. I would not have known about the bag and my purchase had it not been for the e-mail I received today about some purchase I had made being shipped.

My reaction was an immediate WTH!

The now infamous e-mail read as follows:

Dear WANDA,

Thank you for shopping with nomorerack!bag

Order number 2533624 has been shipped and is on its way to you!

DetailsQuantity

Christian Audigier Leather Bags

Style: Messenger

Color: Blue

You Save: $299.99 (87%)

 

Ambien® is an expensive drug.

I went to the website to answer the above question. I found out that it is most probable that I did indeed purchase this bag. I tried to talk to customer service but unfortunately they do not wake up until my lunch time. I will have to wait.

But I am claiming innocence, or at least not guilty by being under the influence of drugs at the time of purchase.

Yes, I believe that is a sound defense strategy.

You want to know the drug that caused this strange behavior? Ambien®.

I’ve been taking Ambien® for quite some time now and the only strange things is has made me do is send indecipherable text messages to friends and strangers and make random phone calls in the middle of the night to people in the contact list of my phone. That and the occasional baking at night. And eating most of the evidence of said baking.

This is a new one that I do not believe is noted on the drug literature but I believe it is still covered under the defense of being under the influence at the time.

I just received an e-mail from customer services stating the following:

* Melvin, Jun 19 08:39 (COT):

Hello Wanda,

Thank you for writing in. Always here to help.

Upon reviewing your account, I see that your was placed on 2015-06-02 18:49:57 and the item description is: Whether you��™re looking for a great new messenger bag to carry-on or take to work, or a beautifully crafted purse to accompany you everywhere, then you��™re going to kick yourself if you miss out on these fabulous Christian Audigier bags. Made from genuine leather, both styles have statement details, functional pockets and luxurious contrasting fabrics. Want to know more? – Both bags made by popular Los Angeles design house Christian Audigier – Unisex messenger bag, makes the perfect day-to-day carrier for stylish men – Luxurious Christian Audigier purse with three front-pocket design – Both bags are made from genuine leather – Luxurious fabrics with contrasting colors and prints

Please let me know if there is anything further I can do to assist you.

Regards,

* Melvin with Customer Care

I’m having a huge sale on e-bay on July 6th or later. Check it out. There will be some great deals on bags.

From the life and mind of:

Wanda M. Argersinger

© 2012 All Rights Reserved

www.wandaargersinger.com

 

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