If things are difficult for your friends, but said friends had a choice in the matter, thus ensuring that they are miserable right now, would you laugh anyway? Yeah, me too.
No apologies here to my frigid friends. It’s all just fun and games until Frosty melts.
I had to wear a coat to work today, for the first time in over 10 years, because some goofball on the television said we are in for a hard freeze. Hold your applause, there is more.
I know that many of you, um, all of you, umm, all three of you are sitting there all bundled up thinking, “Winter in Florida? Really?”
But it’s true, so stop saying you live where you live because you get to experience 4 definitive seasons each year. That’s BS. I live in Florida and, we too, experience 4 seasons each year. I’m not even sorry that 3.98% of those 4 seasons are summer. You know you’d be here if you could, or if I’d invite you to stay with me.
I hear you hrrumphing and muttering under your breath, “Winter? Really? She don’t know nothing ‘bout no winter.” (See Dawn, I can read your mind.) She does, however, know about living in Florida.
This is my winter, and even if I have to hunt up a coat that hasn’t been seen or worn in the past 15 years; even if I have to dig around in the drawers or make a mad dash to the dollar store for gloves; even if I am forced to light a fire in the fireplace to ensure that I don’t freeze to death in the 70+ degree weather; and even if I am forced to sit outside in the sun to keep the homicide rate down during these vicious bouts of SAD; it’s my winter and I will enjoy it.
I have to admit here, I am not prepared for winter. I did not run out and stock up on essentials like, bread, milk, snow shovels, extra fuel, EVO, and beer. I had not called to have a load of firewood delivered. I had not even scoured the closets or attic for the hat/gloves/scarf ensemble I know I have somewhere. I am not a ‘panic at the first sign of bad weather’ person. I like to live dangerously.
Remember, I live in Florida, land of one season, and a couple of cold days where all inhabitants will wander about muttering about freezing to death, having to cover the tropical plants, running out of beer, and having to go outside to clean the pool.
I know and I hear you loud and clear. It’s cold outside.
From the life and mind of Wanda M. Argersinger
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