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Smut and Valentine’s Day Go Eye to Something

I know. I know. It’s February 13, 2015, the day before Valentine’s Day and everyone, okay those outside of Pensacola, are v daytalking about the 50 Shades of Grey movie debut. Y’all may be celebrating your day of love with bondage and submissiveness, but here in Pensacola we have our own brand of smut.

I don’t know if it’s just Pensacola, or just the southern part of this country, or too much booze on the brain, but we seem to have more strip clubs than wayward husbands, horny beach bums, and strippers. That fact can only be topped by the signs posted out front of these ‘clubs’. I have seen signs mentioning Jesus, and I don’t mean the roofer from a Spanish speaking country. I’ve seen signs asking people to come to happy hour after going to Sunday Church. But the one I saw this week tops them all.

On the sign outside one particular strip joint is a sign enticing men and women, yes, let’s not forget how women love to watch other women strip while their husbands put the grocery money in strings, to celebrate Valentine’s Day with drinks and nekkidness.

I kid you not. I saw it with my very own eyes, and nearly caused three accidents in the process. This is on the one street in our town that has a speed limit of 45 mph. Yes, we drink, look at nekkid women, and drive fast too. Hopefully not at the same time, but then again, it is Florida.

I have a lot of friends, many living here in Florida. Not one of them has told me they plan on spending their day of love at the local strip club. Most say they are going to the Casino, or for a weekend get-away, or just want to stay in bed.

How smuttiness became associated with the day known for love and romance is something for further research. Originally the day had to do with hitting women with blood soaked hides to ensure fertility followed by bachelors drawing the name of a female from an urn to whom he would be paired for the coming year. Hmmm. Love? Romance? Perhaps, but certainly not my style.

The truth behind the Valentine legends is murky, like our local swamps. The stories all emphasize his appeal as a sympathetic, heroic and–most importantly–romantic figure. One not necessarily associated with nekkidness and smut. And then again there is that Cupid character who is mostly nekkid, but who would pay money to see him dance on a pole?

I’m sure there are men dying to spend their days with the strippers. There may even be a few women who will be there, though I suspect they will be nekkid and on stage hugging poles.

From the life and warped mind of Wanda M. Argersinger

© 2015 All Rights Reserved


About Wanda Argersinger


  1. Wanda, there seems to be an avalanche that is tearing down the vestiges of things we once held dear. The advertisement for church folk to come on by after they get out of church. Say what?! Words had meanings we all understood at one time, but some titles seem to be crumbling as well. There was a time when Ladies and Gentlemen wouldn’t frequent a strip club. Club is suppose to be an upgrade for the term joint. Keep your eyes open so you don’t get smashed. We’ll do dinner out tonight to try to avoid some of tomorrow’s crowd. I’ll touch her face, hold her hand and do a lot of flirting. You know, some of that old fashion stuff. In line with some of the new fashion stuff though, I’ll let her pay for the meal. HA!

  2. Great post, Wanda. This afternoon my grandson and his wife went to see 50 Shades. Krystal had read the books so knew what to expect. She said David slid down in his chair and covered his eyes. I’m proud of him for being embarrassed.

  3. Great post, Wanda! VAlentine’s Day has gone from a sweet holiday to smut apparently. Tsk tsk.

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