My Top Ten Don’ts For The New Year – 2010
Instead of the normal New Year’s Resolutions, which in my opinion have been done to death and are never achieved anyway, I thought I would make my list of things I hope not to hear about, see or experience in the New Year.
- I don’t want to hear about the other 50 or 100 women who slept with Tiger Woods. Actually I don’t want to hear about any of the women who slept with anyone famous. I just don’t care that much.
- I don’t want to hear how MY bailout money paid for some muckity muck to travel to a resort for massages, golf, and expensive food because he deserves it or because he has stress in his life. Let me get my hands on him and I’ll show him some stress.
- I don’t want to see, experience or hear about the latest security leak in the latest Windows Operating System. I also don’t want to be required to download a new update from Microsoft every 47 seconds just so my computer will continue to operate.
- I don’t want to hear about the latest public figure, be it coach or player or singer or actor or White House dog, who has decided to retire and then unretire. Tell me about it in 10 years, after their mind has settled and their commitment has been proven. I can’t keep up with who has retired, who has unretired, who is playing, where they are playing, or what merchandise they are pitching in the commercials now.
- I don’t want to hear about which famous person lost how many pounds on whatever the new diet craze is unless they paid for the program, suffered without food, did without cosmetic surgery, did not have a personal trainer and food guard on their payroll, and kept the weight off for more than the 2 ½ weeks it took to shoot the commercial for the product/program they followed to lose the weight.
- I don’t want to hear about the latest and greatest iPod, iPhone, Blackberry, touch phone, decoder ring spy phone, or any other electronic gizmo until the electronic gizmos can clean the house, do the laundry and make breakfast.
- I don’t want to know about the latest social networking site called Bemyfriendand wasteyourtime.com. I simply don’t have any time to waste even if it is farming, owning a zoo or an aquarium, or baking in YoVille. I also don’t have time to gamble on line. My life is a big enough gamble for me, thank you very much.
- I don’t want to find out late in the game, that I have to manage another site, page, blog, list, SMS-textogram, toilet-paper-friend-e-mail , or bemyfanforever site. I just want to write funny stuff and have a forum where people can read it.
- I don’t want to hear that my bank has once again merged with the bank I left because I hated them only to find out that my checks are now obsolete, my pin number is useless, and my records are lost because they are not transferable to the new electronic system that transferred them to my now defunct bank.
- 10. I don’t want to hear that 2010 is over knowing I haven’t accomplished new things, written new words, and wished my friends and fans a Very Very Happy and Prosperous New Year!
From the life and mind of:
Wanda M. Argersinger
All Rights Reserved 2009